Always in my heart.

I am not quite sure how this section is going to turn out, but here goes....
If you have ever lost someone close to you, then you will understand where I am coming from.

Well I hope you will...

Firstly I would like to say that you never get over the death of a loved one, you just learn to live with it. Even tho it has been a few years since I last lost a family member, I still have those days where I really do miss them and just want to cry. But I am not the kind of person that will tell anyone how I am really feeling. Hence why I am writing this. I can sit here and recall the times we laughed and the times we cried together. But can say that most of the time we were laughing... Even more so with my Uncle Pete. He was a comedian in his own right. I remember when I was only about 7 years old maybe younger, he worked for the council and we always knew when he was coming to visit. Not by a telephone call, but by his voice. He would sing where ever he was and you are not talking about a quiet voice either. He could be a couple of streets away and you would still hear him. Well when he would get to the house, omg..... it was the brain working over time of where to hide.... lol As he would come and have everyone in fits of laughter. I know I have a wonderful family, but I really do miss him. Now this is getting hard to write...
Just a little over a year after my Uncle Pete passed away, I then lost his wife my Auntie Pat. What a shock that was. I was still trying to cope with the fact of not having Pete in person, then to deal with loosing Pat too... I did think to myself at times and still do... WHY.
I have in total lost 4 very close members of my family.
But I am finding it extremely hard to deal with the fact that I said something to my Step Dad (Ray) before he passed away and that I know I hurt his feelings. And now I don't have the chance to say why I said what I did. I know everyone has their own option on life and death, but Ray if you can feel my feelings or sense them I am sorry.
Ray, Uncle Pete, Auntie Pat and Gary......
LOVE YOU ALL...
ALWAYS IN MY HEART.
X X X

Sarah.

Sarah: She is engaged to Gary and lives here with all our us.
Cant say much about her... Apart from she is just Sarah. Oh yeah she is 23 a bit older than Gary. LOL

Gemma.

Gemma: Now Gemma is a real little prat.....
She looks so sweet and innocent... But she is a little madam when she is out and about the area.
And as for the boy cats coming around for her... Well I have never known a cat to have so many Toms after it. LOL
Not much I can say about her, we have had her since she was 8 weeks old.
And her birthday is on Christmas day.

Billie

Billie: Well what can I say about her...
She first entered in our lives when she was 9 weeks old.
It was because one of our neighbours had just brought her brother, Gary saw him and fell in love with him. Then Charlotte said that there was a girl left. Me being a easy target when it comes to animals, said to Gary that we could go and get her.
So we did...
Since then Billie has played a big part of our family.
Even tho she eats like a dustbin....
But she is a lovable, well behaved family member.
Mind you I have said about getting rid of her at times, but Steve has said that if she goes then he is going with her.

Kiwi

Kiwi 11: Well he is a mini version of Steve... But not quite got all of his Dad's charms yet... Still plenty of time for that. He is a pleasant young boy, who has a cheeky side to him. But you cant help but love him.

My son Daniel.

Daniel 11: He is my youngest child... OMG!!!!! Nightmare.... Daniel has been the one child that I have had to use my temper control skills on. He has always been very hyper, ever since he was a baby. Daniel is a charmer when he wants to be and a little sod other times. But he is my little sod. He is a very emotional young lad, even tho at times he tries to show others that he is a big man and that nothing upsets him. He is just about to start his secondary school, which he is not really looking forward to. But hey we had to go through them days.

Tillie.

Tillie 13: Now she is such a dream to be around and wow great to go shopping with.... Hey it's a girl's thing. lol She is a very sweet young lady, who has a lot to offer in life. Has a good head on her shoulder's and will not take any crap.

My daughter Sophie.

Sophie 14: Right... She is a very special young lady. She was born on Fathers Day... LOL Even tho she has had her health problems already in life, she is a very strong fighter. Will not let anything get to her, but deep down at times I really believe that it does. She is currently attending school, where she is doing extremely well. But am not looking forward to the next 18 months or so. As if she does well in her exams, it will cost Steve and I a small fortune. But will be worth every penny.

Paul.

Paul 16: He is a very charming young man, who I look upto... And not just in height, ok he towers over me. But I must say that he does get a lot of respect from me. I am proud to say that he is part of my family and will always see him as one of my own.

My son Gary.

Gary: Well he is my first born, but can't really call him a baby now, as he is 21 years old. He has been my back bone over the years. He is a smashing young man, with so much to offer life. He currently is living at home with his girlfriend Sarah. His love in life apart from Sarah, is motorbikes. That reminds me that the back garden has turn't into a garage... lol
Love you always.
X X X

How I met Steve.

Now this part is not going to be too long.....
I first came to know about Steve, via the web site called Myspace. lol
I received a friends request from him and at that point in my life I was getting a few guy's trying to come on to me. As I just started my divorce. So yeah I accepted his request and thought to myself here we go again.....
How WRONG was I....
We spoke on the site a few times, before we gave each other our MSN addy. For quiet a while we would speak very briefly and to be honest I think it was more support for each other, as Steve was going through his divorce as well... Started just after mine.
Then one day our conversation just seem to go on and on... It continued from the computer to the telephone. OMG!!!!!!! Well the telephone conversation was not like any other normal call, it continued and continued, over the course of 4 days and nights. Honestly I think I only had no more than 6 hours sleep over them 4 days and nights. From that we continued to talk daily and I invited Steve to come to London to visit and to get to meet the kids. Which he did and wow what a wonderful time I had. Am sure that Steve would say the same. And now we are living together and I can honestly say that I love him and always will. X X X

My Partner.

Steve: Well he is just the greatest person I have ever met. He has 3 wonderfull kids that play a big part of my life along with the rest of the family.
When I say Steve is the greatest this is not because I am living with him, as I will say a few things why I say this. Steve is the kind of guy, (yes I said guy) that will help and advise anyone.
He will do his best to make sure that his friends and family are happy. He is not the kind of person that will sit back and see other's upset or sad.
Steve is a very happy guy and if you ever see him not laughing or joking with someone then something is wrong. There very rarley a day that goes by without him having a laugh with someone.

Nicky.

Nicky is the name... LOL

Ok I am nearly 38 years old and live in West London, United Kingdom.
I have 3 kids, a dog and a cat.... Will get to them in a bit.
I was born in London, have a twin brother Peter and a older brother Stuart.
I am currently in the middle of a divorce, well hopefully coming to the end of it.
But have moved on a long way since then....
Am now living with my partner Steve, who I really do love dearly.
He is not only my partner, but he is my lover, best friend and soul mate.